I venture to say that most people believe it’s important for family and friends to stay connected amidst life’s busyness. However, many of us seem to get stuck on thinking that hosting a get-together is too costly or overwhelming and therefore never comes to fruition. Though planning a successful get-together does require a tad of forethought and a smidge of creativity, it doesn’t have to be expensive or stressful.

It’s time to turn down the Martha Stewart mantras that may be ringing in your ears to the tones of, "You don’t cook as well as your Mama did." "You have dust bunnies that overpopulate your home." "You don’t have enough time or money to conduct a proper soiree." But there is nothing in my book that says we have to live up to this "Martha standard" in order to provide ample hospitality and have a good ole time with people we care about.

First, begin with a simple plan. Devise a guest list, a party date and a theme. Invite the number of people you can adequately accommodate without feeling overwhelmed. Invite people who you feel will jive well together, adding some "spice" to your party. Then go ahead and add in your theme, which is a key ingredient to any party plan, as it gets creative juices flowing. For example, if you decide on an Italian theme, just the word, "Italian," can get you to thinking about fun pasta possibilities, fresh-baked breads, tangy sauces, specialty antipastos, ambiance and operatic music. Food selections, mood and decorating ideas just naturally come together when you pick a theme.

Next, focus on food. With a theme in place, turn your thoughts to food selections that make use of local ingredients that are in peak season (and are at their cheapest). Hit the Farmer’s Market for the freshest options. Think too about cooking just one thing well, according to your standards, not Martha’s. (Remember that you can cook simply without sacrificing on elegance and quality by dressing things up with fancier sauces, spices and spreads). Then, if you wish, compliment the rest of your meal with pre-made or easy prep store-bought items. Formulate these purchases according to what’s on sale or for what coupons are available to you. Planning ahead in this way will save you from running around town at the last hour making expensive or impulse purchases.

Once food selections are made, consider decorations for a bit. Even the tiniest additions can go a long way to show you care. I have always been surprised that even my frugal decorative touches (like wild flowers or pinecones from the outdoors, for instance), have garnished compliments. It doesn’t require a lot to make something appear special. Just use what’s on hand or in season. Or consider a not-so-obvious use for a centerpiece (like a nifty yard sale whatchamacallit find) and imagine the conversation starters that will emerge! Finally, candles, white lights, tiki torches and the like, are also options that provide ambience and a festive atmosphere on a budget.

Finally, when the guests arrive, don’t be intimidated by what to serve them on. If you are like me, you may not own a 16-piece China set, or you may have mismatched every day dinnerware because you happen to have three toddlers in the house... and accidents happen (Sorry, Martha, I know this pains you). If you are looking to be frugal, you can either borrow formal dinnerware from family or friends, or you can hit the dollar stores for your "wares." They have cheap paper goods galore (even in fancy colors and designs), so you can still make it pleasing to the eye, keeping everyone as happy as pie.

The bottom line is that you will be going with the flow and focusing on the important stuff-- being hospitable and gracious while connecting with others. So eat potluck, grill out, serve tapas style, dine out on the patio or with TV trays in the family room--- anything! Just organize those dust bunnies in an orderly fashion, enough to make it cozy and then simply let go of the fear and the excuses you have about entertaining. Make it a point to connect with loved ones this season.